Hello Friends,
Summer is officially here. Although this is a great time to spend with your family, it can also be a time that cause strain on your marriage. With the kids out of school, and fun to be had by all, it’s easy to fill your calendar to the absolute max. If you aren’t careful your marriage can feel the effects of this. It can come to the point where you and your spouse are like two ships that pass in the night. That weakens connection.
Here at A Beautiful Adventure Marriage, we are all about adventure and fun, but not at the expense of your relationship. On this blog, let’s look at 5 ways to have fun this summer, enjoy your kids, but still keep your connection as husband and wife.
5 Ways for Your Marriage to Thrive this Summer
Yes, there are a lot of fun things that are exclusive to summertime. There are also a lot of good things that can be done during the summer as a family. This does not mean; however, that your family has to do them all. We definitely encourage you to plan some activities for your family this summer. Just be sure to leave some down time to rest and recharge between activities. You can do this in a few different ways.
Sit down and have a discussion as husband and wife to figure out what your capacity is this summer.
Chances are you both still have to work during the summer. So factor in the non-negotiable things that have to happen and then choose the activities that you can manage. If you and your spouse spend the whole summer running in different directions it will be very difficult to stay connected and enjoy intimacy with them.
After you and your spouse have the chance to sit down together, then include the kids.
Explain to them that you can’t do all the things but work together as a family to decide what you want to do. Ask them what their top choices would be and allow them to have some input in the conversation. If something just can’t happen, explain to them why it can’t. They may not understand, or even get upset. However, you want to have a connection to them, just like you do your spouse. If they are going in a million directions, you may be missing out on quality time with them as well.
Another way you can keep your calendar free is to limit the number of activities per week.
Once you have decision what you can handle, stick to it. If you can handle two things pre-week, make that your limit. You will really have to be intentional because I know I have been guilty of loading down my calendar and regretting it later.
This one may be a little difficult for some of you, but you don’t have to do every single thing you kids want to do. You can say no and still be a good parent. Remember if you and your spouse are running all over the place all the time, your marriage will not be as strong as it could be. It is easy to become roommates instead of lovers when your schedule is packed.
Honestly, kids need to see what a good marriage is more than they need to do every single activity that comes up.
Your children will only know what to expect in marriage by watching you model it. It is good for your kids to see you choose your spouse from time to time. It will show them how to treat their spouse someday. So, if your kids ask you to do something that you can’t do and maintain a connection with your spouse, it’s ok to say no. They may complain, cry, or get upset, but like my mama use to say…they will live.
It’s important not only to have family time but for you and your spouse to have someone on one time during the summer. So be sure to schedule a regular date night throughout the next few months.
Dating is one of the best ways to keep connection and intimacy alive in your marriage.
Marriage can be so fun, and dating is one of the vehicles you can use to have fun, so be intentional about scheduling that date night and having fun with your spouse.
Now that you have picked the activities for the kids and schedule some date nights for you and your spouse, now let’s find some things to do together as a family. Once a week you could pick a family member and do something together that they enjoy. This is a great way to enjoy time as a family, but not only are you spending time together, but you are also learning what everyone likes to do. This also gives everyone a day or night that they get to pick what the family does.
I believe everyone has more fun when they know they will get a turn to choose what is done.
You can also have game nights, movie nights, do outside activities, the list goes on, but find some time to just enjoy your spouse and children. Laughter and fun really are the best medicine!
I know all the tips we have mentioned may seen like a lot. It is! When you have a spouse, children, and things to do, it can be overwhelming. That is why we added in this last tip.
Throughout the summer, it is crucial that you and your spouse have check ins. It will take a lot of trial and error to go through your summer in a way that causes your marriage to thrive, and your family to grow closer.
You and your spouse will have to work together as a team for this to be successful.
I would suggest having a weekly check in. Get up before the kids once a week and go over your calendar together. Make sure the two of you are on the same page, because you and your spouse will be the ones that set the tone for your summer.
Have Fun this Summer
By the time fall gets here, you don’t want to be exhausted with little to show for it. Doing everything we mentioned above may take a little work on the front end, but this work will help you and your family to have an amazing summer.
Our prayer is that you and your family will end summer closer than when you went into it.
You can do this!
We are praying for you!
Before You Go!
If you are looking for a marriage resource that you and your spouse can do together this summer, check out one of our Youversion Reading Plans. These plans can be done in just a few days and they are packed full of Biblical wisdom and practical steps that can strengthen your marriage.